Friend of Anna Chaplaincy from 'Down Under', Ben Boland, writes:
'An Australian Christmas is hot, snow only comes from a spray can, and the kangaroos all wear tinsel – just kidding. An Ozie Christmas and an English Christmas are literally hemispheres apart. One unifying factor is that Christmas is often a very hard time for older people and people living with dementia.
But, isn’t Christmas a time of joy, faith and family?
That is certainly the media and cultural presentation. Like kangaroos with tinsel, this image is attractive, but often at best a mirage, at worst a booby trap. Crackers (called ‘bonbons’ in Australia) crack with a dad joke and trinket, while Christmas often explodes with tears, sorrow and heartbreak.
Christmas is typically terrible for those mourning the loss of a loved one – who have left an empty chair at Christmas dinner and a gaping hole in the heart. It is a time of isolation and loneliness for those who have no family, or whose family are far away. For those living with dementia it can be a time of chaos, confusion and challenge. For many Christians the crass commercialisation of Christmas brings sadness, frustration and even anger. The desecration of the ‘reason for the season’ leads some to engage in the culture war, or to retreat to the safety of our church family.
As Christians and particularly Christians who care about older people, we have an opportunity to neither flee nor fight but to LOVE. To love the older people who are in our communities. To facilitate a Christmas meal together. Not simply running a nativity play in church but taking it to the care home too – the ‘oldies’ are an appreciative audience. To run a Christmas service not in the church but where the older people in your community are already gathering: a senior citizen group or where bingo is played perhaps.
In the Australian context I have run several Christmas Carol events in care home car parks. The space means family and friends can come, the flat surface suits people who use wheels to mobilise and battery candles are always a hit. I also recommend a simple BBQ and ice-creams on a stick. An English variant might be mince pies and mulled wine. Instead of gathering in the snowy carpark, what about carolling through the care home? You may not get Figgie pudding, but you will share Jesus’ love. I suspect carols, mulled wine and mince pies would be a hit.
Finally consider investing in Christmas resources designed for ministry with older people:
· The Messy Resources – Messy Christmas, Messy Vintage and Messy church. https://www.annachaplaincy.org.uk/messy-vintage
· Hymns we Love – includes a special Christmas session on ‘Hark the Herald Angels Sing’. https://www.thegoodbook.com.au/hymns-we-love/
· Joy to the World – which shares the message of Christmas with people living with moderate to advanced dementia (I co-authored it).
The Revd Ben Boland BSc (Hon), MDiv, Grad Dip (Ageing & Pastoral) is a visiting lecturer at Brisbane School of Theology and Mary Andrews College. He has served as an older persons’ chaplain for over fifteen years, and is passionate about Gospel ministry with older people and people living with dementia. His next book, Priceless People: Loving older people and people living with dementia, will be released by Christian Focus Publication in mid-2025.
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